“The No. 1 reason people have trouble in their relationship or marriage is due to the lack of communication,” says Dr. Janne’ Lomasky, co-author of the self help book for people considering divorce, “To Stay or Not To Stay.”  Dr. Lomasky is a Boca Raton psychologist, hypnotherapist, and Florida Supreme Court certified family mediator.

Dr. Lomasky mentions several other common causes of relationship trauma including low self-esteem and spending so much time at work that a relationship is formed at the workplace. One of the biggest new obstacles to relationships is that social media is leading many couples to Dr. Lomasky’s office. Increasingly, when a spouse becomes bored or feels like something is missing from their relationship, they start or renew friendships on social media to fill the void they feel in their marriage. This can first lead to emotional infidelity, and possibly physical infidelity. Husbands are contacting old girlfriends; wives are contacting old boy friends. Instead of talking to their spouse about the void they are feeling, they go out and look to fill that void with someone else.

Dr. Lomasky suggests, “If your relationship is in trouble, the best thing to do is not ignore it. People need to identify the obstacles that have them talking at each other and not to each other.” She goes on to suggest showing your spouse affection and empathy, using a positive tone of voice, and being kind to your spouse.

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