Though divorce is a difficult and emotional process for families to go through, contrary to popular belief, divorce isn’t always negative for children, and, in fact, according to Dr. Shoshana Bennett, sometimes it’s excellent for children. Dr. Bennett lists five ways in which your children can benefit from divorce.
When parents argue and fight and are unhappy, no one else in the family is happy. It very stressful for children to see and hear their parents fight and argue. Once a divorce is over and mom and dad have moved on, the stress of the relationship is gone, and there is no more arguing and fighting and everyone is happier. When mom and dad are happy, children are happy as well.
Unfortunately, when the tension is great in a household, children’s behavior deteriorates . When parents divorce the household tension dissolves, and children become more relaxed and their behavior improves.
Staying in a bad relationship “for the kids”, is not benefitting anyone. When you divorce, there will be an adjustment period, but the end result will be positive. You are actually showing your children not to settle for an unhealthy marriage when you end an unhappy marriage.
Sharing custody of children can give your kids the opportunity to fully experience each parent. Many times when both parents are together, one parent does most of the nurturing and planning. After a divorce, a child will have each parent focusing just on him when they spend time together.
Whether or not you enter into another relationship, your children can benefit by watching your happy independence or your new positive relationship.
What is important to remember after you divorce is that your new life is what you make it and your children’s attitude, behavior and well-being will follow suit.