Regardless of where an individual is in the divorce process, they are undoubtedly experiencing a veritable overload of emotions. Whether it’s at the beginning of the process, wondering what went wrong, or worrying about how family members are going to side in the middle of the process, or nearing the end of the process and stressing out about facing the future alone, the truth is that divorce is one of the most emotionally and psychologically damaging things a person can undergo.
One of the most powerfully-simple pieces of advice out there is that being alone doesn’t have to be lonely. That might ring hollow when you are feeling lonely, or when you know that your ex is not lonely, but there are some simple solutions as well.
Say your kids are with their father, and you are alone in the house. One of the best things you can do is keep a list of things to do with you at all times. It’s even better if you can keep it in a to-do list app on a smartphone or something, so that you can rotate through the items. Things like watching TV or reading a book are good if you have something to really distract yourself, but going out and exercising, going for a drive, or even cleaning up the house are even better ideas. If you work from home, you can always do that as well.
As they say, time heals all wounds, and even if it’s not entirely the case, it’s definitely true that the pain will dissipate and fade into the background. This process will be sped up drastically if you can do things that remind you of the joys in life, rather than allowing the emotions to overwhelm and control you.
Probably the most important thing to come out of a divorce is the notion of loving one’s self. It is always a good idea to be comfortable doing things alone, and to genuinely enjoy your own company. Often times it helps taking a journal and writing down things about yourself that you love, skills or qualities that you’d like to develop, and activities that you’ve always wanted to try.
The road out of divorce is a long and bumpy one, but if you take the time to figure out more things about yourself, you may just find you have the best companion for the ride: Yourself.